Is it really just luck & timing? Or is there a natural queue?
Today I had an amazing day in the sun. Walking, biking, laying, laughing.
We walking around, biked around the park, sunbathed, got pizza, learned how to skateboard. We did very little but it was very full.
On the way home I bumped into an old colleague. We went to get ice cream. One of those little spontaneous moments inserted into your days.
During ice cream, he said something to me that caught me a bit off guard. When conversing about a person in my life (a person in my past and somewhat present) that I am giving a ‘time allowance’ to, the ex-colleague said that I should not wait that long, that there is a natural queue that exists. I disagreed, because I don’t really believe in a “queue”, rather, time, luck, and coincidences when it comes to people and romance.
But this got me thinking. Is there a natural order in how love comes about? A queue, where only after one, the next arrives? In theory, no. But in practice, as humans, we have a time stunted disability to go beyond the present moment heartaches and attachments. It’s difficult, extremely difficult, to have enough emotional and mental openness to give the next person an objective and fair shot. Perhaps that’s the queue?
Even with the correct timing, luck and coincidences, we fall short of recognizing these moments because we get blindsided, or because we are shortsighted.
The ex-colleague asked if I wanted to borrow a jacket. I simply responded with “no, I’m good. I’m not cold.” Only for him to tell me that he was trying to offer it so that we would have to meet again in the future so that I can return it. I didn’t even notice that he was trying to flirt or make a gesture. So many gestures of love go unnoticed because we, I, are fixated on this one idealized version of what we want or hope to see. And sometimes, it’s via that one person that we’re subconsciously (or consciously) holding on to. We’re subconsciously manifesting this queue.